Diabolical Plan - Part 1..............

Remember my concern about keeping my kids busy this summer?

I think I've got an idea.

Last week Jacob and Peter spent the entire week working on the yard. Their dad offered them an undisclosed amount of money to rake, weed, and mulch the 'natural area' in our backyard. It's a pretty big area and it needed LOTS of work. It kept them outside and busy most of the week. And they did a great job, too.

My plan for this week is even better. I signed up the four still at home (Jacob, Mary, Sam and Peter) to help out with Cub Scout Day Camp. They will spend the week serving as Den Leaders and Den Chiefs for a bunch of cub scouts. They will be gone every day from 8 until about 4:30.

I figure that if they can't find paying jobs, then I will find non-paying jobs for them. The next week, Mary will be volunteering at our church Girl's Camp for the week (that one is a sleepover camp!) And I may just send Jacob to Boy Scout camp in July if he is still unemployed. If this doesn't make them want to get 'real' jobs, I don't know what will!!

I wonder what other organizations need help this summer........

Video Games.......

Okay, so I got this package in the mail yesterday. My birthday is on Sunday. I figured that it might be a birthday gift so I briefly considered not opening it until Sunday. That lasted about 15 seconds. After all, maybe it wasn't a birthday gift, maybe it was.......umm.....ummm...... something else that needed to be opened immediately.

Turns out it was a birthday gift. From my brother, Peter. He sent me a Wii Fit. I have been wanting to try one for a while now, and oh, my gosh, is it ever fun!!

I realize, of course, that I'm old, and that video games are typically for the young, but I happen to like video games. To me, video games are the great equalizer between me and my kids. I mean, really, I used to be able to run faster than my kids, beat them at arm wrestling, do more sit-ups, push ups, etc. Those days are long gone. They can outlast, outrun, outplay me anyday. Not so with video games. In video games I can actually challenge my kids on a level playing field.

I'm really good at Brain Age (a mother's day gift from two of my boys), pretty good at Mario Kart (one of my favorites!), not bad at the 'old school' Sonic games, and I've been working on my drumming skills on Rock Band (I've still got a ways to go on that one!)

Now that I (we) have Wii Fit, we have even more challenges to do together. We've had it less than 24 hours and so far Jacob has the high score on the Ski Jump and Ski Slalom, Sam is best at Soccer Heading and Tight Rope Walk, and I hold the high score in Table Tilt and Hula Hoop. Yes, we've already logged quite a bit of time on the Wii Fit.

Now if I could only find the time to get the laundry done.

Summer....

Summer is fast approaching. Sam is already done with school. Peter has just 8 more days. I'm starting to panic.

My kids idea of a perfect summer is unlimited video games, pool time, and sleep. I like summer to be just a little more productive than that. Last year I tried to have a S.M.A.R.T. summer. It flopped. I'm not sure what to do this year. We do have several activities planned. Scout camp and things like that, but we will still have plenty of down time. I have learned over the years that too much down time leads to kids that are cranky, argumentative, and bored.

So, I'm coming to you for help. What can I do (or have my kids do) that will be fun, productive and inexpensive? Any ideas??

Jacob.....

I mentioned a month or so ago that Jacob had gone out to Utah.

He had trouble finding a job and missed his family (at least that's my story) so he came home again about 10 days ago.

Because Jacob knows how bored I am on the weekends (remember Peter's accident two weeks ago?) he took pity on me last Friday (the 13th!!) and broke his collarbone. That's just the kind of guy he is.....always thinking of others. 'Hmm...mom might be bored this weekend....what can I do to liven things up? I know, maybe if I break a bone!!' Here is his x-ray for your viewing pleasure....

So, now I have two broken boys. Peter was back at the Doc last Wednesday, and things are looking good enough with his leg that they put a cast on. The doc is still not sure that he won't need surgery, but for now, it looks like he might be okay. He will still need a cast for 4-6 weeks, but that's loads better than the surgery option where recovery can take months.

Back to Jacob.....He went snowboarding with a friend on Friday up in N.C. I reminded him as he walked out the door that he has no health insurance and to be careful (I know, I know....it's all my fault!!) He called me about 2 in the afternoon, FROM THE HOSPITAL, to let me know. (My theory has always been that if my kid is capable of calling me after an accident, that's good news. Much better than a stranger calling me to tell me about it.) Luckily, he had a friend with him who was able to stay with him at the hospital and deliver him home after he was released. As you can see from the x-ray, he did a good job breaking the collarbone. His shoulder is hurting, too, as is his knee, but hopefully those will be okay. Apparently, they don't do much for broken collarbones. He has a sling, but that's about it. He should be okay in 4-5 weeks.

Do you think I should take up a collection at the grocery store to help pay his ER bill?

Go West, Young Man, Go West!!

Jacob has decided to move to Utah. He left two weeks ago and made the L-O-N-G drive from South Carolina to Cedar City. It only took him 4 days. Of course, he had to stop in Memphis to visit friends, and then again in Las Vegas (where he served his mission) for more visiting.

He is currently living with his Grandfather in Cedar City, looking for work and trying to decide if Cedar is the place for him. If not, he has other options in the Provo/Orem area. So far, in his Utah adventure, he has gone snowboarding at Brianhead and driven his Grandfather to Salt Lake City for a doctor's appointment.

His decision to move west was prompted by the facts that A) He had no job here and jobs seem to be pretty scarce right now, B) He was tired of living at home, and C) The 'dating pool' here consists of about 3 people. You can tell by the picture that he has literally been climbing the walls since he returned from his mission a year and a half ago.

So he's off to the land of 'Zion' to seek his fortune and make his way in the world. We miss him, but wish him luck on his quest. Jacob.....we love you, and hope you find what you're looking for!!

(P.S. If anyone knows of any jobs available in Cedar City or Provo/Orem let me know, I've got just the guy for the job!!)

Arranged Marriages.......

When I was young my mother took me to see 'Fiddler on the Roof'. I loved the movie. I still do. I loved how the father, Tevye, had conversations with God as he went about his daily chores. I loved how the family was (mostly) happy, even though they had nothing and were dirt poor. I loved how the daughters rebelled against the tradition of arranged marriages and made their own choices about who they would love/marry/spend their life with.

Now that I am grown I see things a little differently. I still love the relationship between Tevye and his Heavenly Father. I, too, have conversations with God as I go about my day. I am, however, rethinking the rebellious daughters and the merits of arranged marriage.

I've come to the conclusion that there is something to be said for arranged marriages. I mean really, think about it. How much perspective can hormone-ravaged young people have? Can't we, as older and wiser adults, see further into the future and better predict the outcome of a certain match? Young people see only themselves and a Disney-esque future of "happily ever after". We (older and wiser) see families, extended families, support systems, future speed bumps and roadblocks. We have perspective!!

Yes, arranged marriages are the way to go. Having 4 children (okay, fine....young adults) of marrying age I can see that my work is cut out for me. I can easily see who might (or more importantly...might NOT) be a good match for my kids. (No, Mary, I don't have anyone picked out for you) I base these choices on maturity, reliability, perceived compatibility, family background and yes, attractiveness. (after all, who wants ugly grandchildren!)

I haven't yet figured out how to get my kids to go along with this plan....I raised them all to think for themselves. In retrospect, that may be my downfall. I can sympathize with Tevye and his strong-willed daughters.

Wish me luck!!

Do I REALLY need to tell you these things????

I was reading this blog yesterday, and as I was preparing to comment on it, I realized that I could probably write my own blog about this subject. In case you decide not to read the linked blog (you really should, though) it's about the things we think we shouldn't have to tell our children to do/not do (like 'spit on the carpet'!) but it turns out we really should have told them.

Here are my top ten:

1. Don't put dimes in the car power adapter. Sparks will fly and you may set the car on fire.

2. Don't put Hot Wheels cars (or toast) in the VCR. It will severely impede the functionality of said VCR.

3. Don't try to balance pennies on top of night-lights. The penny may slip behind the night-light and get caught on the prongs, causing sparks to fly, and the penny to melt. You may have to throw a pillow at the night-light over and over again to knock it out of the wall safely.

4. Don't push the mattress off of your bed. It may lodge against the door and you and your sister may be trapped in your room for quite some time.

5. Don't prank Eleanor. You will regret it.

6. Don't test the sharpness of the knife by running it across the palm of your hand. Just trust me when I tell you that it's sharp!

7. Wear shoes when playing baseball. It hurts when the other players step on your feet, and you may just break a bone sliding into home plate.

8. Never stack a chair on top of a table in the gym at church, then leap off the chair trying to grab the rim of the basketball standard. You will spend the rest of the summer in a cast.

9. Don't play in the car with your two-year-old sister. And, especially, don't put the car in reverse. You may have to use all of your five-year-old strength to keep the car from rolling into the street.

10. Don't put beans up your nose.

If I've missed any, please let me know. I've still got a few years of parenting left and I want to be sure I cover all my bases.

Goodbye, Summer.....

Even though my kids have been back in school for a few weeks now, today represents the official end of summer. I guess it's because, among other things, it's the last day that the neighborhood pool is open. So, here is my 'end of summer' tribute:

In June, Laura and Jennie came to visit.....

We played at the park......

And went swimming at the neighborhood pool......

In July, we celebrated our country's independence........bought two new (used) cars.........

babysat turtles while our friends were on vacation.......

And went swimming at the neighborhood pool....

In August, we started school.......

Played in the backyard........


And went swimming at the neighborhood pool......

Special thanks to Sam and Peter for being the best 'pool buddies' ever this summer!! You guys really made the summer fun for Sirius and Sabian. I know that I couldn't have done it without you......THANKS!!

I hope all of you had a great summer, too......I can't wait for next year!!

Making memories....

I'm of the opinion that memories are made in the little things. Sure, the kids would remember a trip to Disneyland/World, whatever (not that we've ever taken one....okay, maybe when Eleanor & Laura were 4 and 2 1/2, and I don't think they remember!), but I think it's really the little stuff that we sometimes don't even think about that they really remember.

For example, when my kids were younger, we took Eleanor, Laura and Jacob to the cannery. (They were the only ones old enough to go at the time, Jacob was probably 12.) They still talk about how fun that was and wish that we could have done it more often. They talk about our summer days at Powder Springs Pool a little community pool where we spent our summers during the years we lived in Atlanta. They remember playing behind the elementary school across the street from our house, 4-square in the street, the pile of dirt that was in our backyard for years, jumping in the sprinkler, riding bikes, playing with the neighbor kids, making cookies, etc.

I guess my point is that memories don't cost a lot of money, but they do require time, effort and patience. It took time for me to load up all the kids (and half the neighborhood) and go to the pool all the time. It took me being outside with them (instead of inside doing chores) to help them learn how to ride bikes. It took a lot of behind the scenes looking out for them to let them have the freedom of ruling the neighborhood the way they did when they were younger. It took patience to let them build a mud bath in the dirt mound and play in the mud because I knew I was going to have to hose them off and that laundry was going to be a pain. It was a lot of work, but they have great memories of those days.

And now, with the next generation, I get to do it again. Tonight, when I was making the gourmet dinner of French Toast and Sausages, I tried to be patient when Sirius and Sabian pushed chairs up and 'helped' me. Because I knew that we were making more than dinner, we were making memories. I hope that someday, when Eleanor has her own place, her kids have fond memories of the days they lived at 'Abuela and Grandpa's house'. I hope they remember the nights when mommy was at work and we went to the Neely Farm pool and stayed until they closed. I hope they remember the nights we had 'game night' and played Mouse Trap, and Dominos, and Battleship. I hope they remember Grandpa taking them for walks, and going to feed the ducks in the pond, and playing at the park, and Grandpa telling them bedtime stories. I hope they remember Family Home Evening and singing 'Do as I'm doing'. I hope they remember hanging out with Sam, Peter, Jacob and Mary, watching tv and playing video games.

I hope they remember it all. I know I will.

Parenting Styles.......

After 25+ years of parenting, I still haven't figured it out. My parenting style ranges from being the 'fun' parent to being a drill sargeant. There really has never been much middle ground. I'm a 'nice guy' until something just pushes me over the edge and then I swing back to 'drill sargeant'. That works until I just get tired of being the bad guy, I feel sorry for my kids, so I let up and go easy on them again. Unfortunately for them, I feel the drill sargeant coming on.....

I don't ask much, I really don't. I mean, if I'm going to be the 'cool' mom and let you bring food to the basement while you watch t.v., is it too much to ask that you bring the dishes up when you're finished? I've been missing 3 dinner plates for about a week now. I thought maybe they were in someone's bedroom, but no, they're downstairs. A while back (my very first post, in fact) I made a list of things that I found under the stove while I was sweeping. It was a fairly substantial list. I think it's time for another list. It's called:

What I found when I made the mistake of entering the basement:

3 dinner plates
5 cups
1 bowl & spoon
10 IBC bottles
9 water bottles (some empty, some not)
1 soda can
6 popsicle wrappers
8 socks (various sizes, none match)
1 pair sweat pants
1 sleeping bag (unrolled)
3 pillows
1 pair yellow rain boots
1 mirror
1 zune (think: Ipod)
1 hacksaw (I am NOT kidding!)
1 measuring tape
1 stress ball
2 towels
3 mexican blankets
1 roll duct tape
1 pen
1 pencil
2 cans air freshener

All of this was either on the floor or on the coffee table, mostly on the floor. Now I know that this room was clean just two weeks ago. We had company and they stayed downstairs. Company is also why there is a sleeping bag, pillows, sheets and blankets down there. I have been asking for the kids to clean up down there. "Hey, (insert name), roll up that sleeping bag and put it away, (or the pillows, or the blankets) will you?" "Sure mom, no problem!"
Apparently......there is a problem.
I know it's summer break, I know kids need time to be kids, relax, chill out, veg in front of the t.v. and video games. But summer break does not mean a break from ALL responsibilities!! Bring up your dishes or don't eat downstairs!! Throw your trash in the trashcan!! (Yes, I know it's filled to overflowing, SO EMPTY IT!!) If you use the tools (a hacksaw???) then put them away, too! Clean up after yourself!!
So....my kids will now be subjected to 'Drill Sargeant' mom for a while. I've already taken all the controllers for all the video games. T.V. privileges will be next if chores don't start getting done. Not sure how long it will last this time....it could be a while.

Week One and the 'Honey-Do' List.....

We've (I've) survived week one of Joe's unemployment. I have to say that the yard is starting to look pretty good! And while I am envisioning having the ultimate 'summer of the honey-do list', Sam, Peter and Mary are ready for their Dad to get a job!
Mary is used to having the computer to herself. Oh, I get on here and there for 5-10 minutes at a time to check e-mail, see if my books have come in at the library, or 'blog', but most of the time the computer is hers. She blogs, twitters, chats, surfs, e-mails, IM's, etc., and having Dad home all day is really cutting into her computer time. Now Joe is on, checking e-mail, sending out resumes, catching up on the news, searching job sites. Poor Mary is going through 'computer withdrawal'.
As for Sam and Peter...well, let's just say that they feel like they've just finished a week of 'Saturdays'. They've done more yard work this week than they have in the last two months. Usually, yard work is reserved for Saturdays, when Dad is home. With Joe home full-time, every day is Saturday. The boys have mowed, raked, spread pine straw, burned wood, cut wood, stacked wood and dis-assembled the trampoline. (It got a hole in it after the boys decided it would be fun to put a lawn chair on it, have Peter sit on it, and see how high they could bounce him. It was fun until the leg of the chair broke off and the jagged edge ripped through the fabric!)
So while I look forward to a productive summer with Joe painting, cleaning, and finishing long-forgotten projects, the kids are really hoping that he goes back to work soon!

S.M.A.R.T. Summer!

My kids are in trouble now! When I was reading one of my new favorite blogs, I was turned on to S.M.A.R.T. Goals. Apparently, this is a tool used by corporate america (and smart parents everywhere!) to encourage productivity. S.M.A.R.T. stands for Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, Timed. There are many variations of this, of course, but you get the idea. So as I sit here with a houseful of people who think that they will spend the summer sleeping in, surfing the net, and playing video games, I am instead coming up with all kinds of ideas about how to have a more productive summer. Don't get me wrong, they can still have fun, I'm all about balance in life, I just plan to sit down with them and encourage them to set some SMART goals. For instance, Sam and Peter have Eagle Scout projects to finish, summer reading to do for school, and a room to clean. S.M.A.R.T. Goals, here we come!! Mary needs to finish her paperwork for college and get a job....S.M.A.R.T. Goals to the rescue! As for the rest of us, let's just say that I'm sure we could benefit from S.M.A.R.T. Goals as well. S.M.A.R.T. summer here we come! (I'll let you know how it works out!)

The Last Days.....Armbruster Style

It seems like we've had a lot of 'last days' lately.....

Eleanor and Mary had their 'last day' of school the first part of May. They are both taking the summer off, and Mary will probably take off fall semester, too, so she can work and save money. Our plan is that she goes to BYU Idaho in January.

Sam and Peter had their 'last day' of seminary on May 16th. I was a great year for them. Sr. Terry is such an awesome teacher! I'm glad that they've had the opportunity to learn from her. I hope she continues to teach seminary (at least until they graduate!)

Sam and Peter's 'last day' of school was May 22nd. I guess it was an okay school year. Great as far as friends go, okay as far as academics, but we're all glad it's done. I know I was tired of homework every night! Peter is most likely switching schools next year. He wants to go to Woodmont. That's fine with me. Sam wants to stay where he is though, also fine with me. At this age, I tell them to pray about such decisions, and let me know what they decide. I trust them to choose the right path for themselves.

Sirius had his 'last day' of school on Friday last week. He had a great year!! He came out of 4K reading a little bit, made lots of new friends, and is ready for Kindergarten next year. He also had an end-of-year party that was pretty fun.

Joe's 'last day' of work is tomorrow. Still no job, but he has a couple of 'irons in the fire'. One is Atlanta (think traffic!), the other in Asheville. He has interviewed with both, and now we're just waiting to hear something. He sends out resumes every day, everywhere in the country. I could tell that he was getting desperate when he told me that he applied for a job in Minnesota!! He's still thawing out from when we lived there before (1984-85) I think we're entering 'The Fourth Watch". Which must mean that this trial is almost over! (I could be terribly wrong, but let's hope not!)

My 'last days'......to send kids out the door for seminary and school, to yell at kids about homework and projects that are due, my last day to send my husband off to work. My last day of sanity? Let's just say, it could be a LONG summer!