Sunrise, Sunset.........

I'm feeling very 'Fiddler on the Roof' today. I seems like just recently I had a houseful of little ones. Today, my youngest daughter and my youngest son had a birthday. Mary is 21 now, and Peter is 16. (Yes, they share a birthday. We couldn't figure out what to give Mary the year she turned 5, so we gave her a brother. They call each other 'birthday buddies')

When did this happen!?

How did this happen!?

Oh, I know that people told me it would happen.

'Enjoy them while they're small.' '

They grow up so fast.'

Of course, I didn't believe them. Those toddler years seemed to last forever. I had 6 children in 10 years. Chaos was status quo back then. It was like living in the eye of the storm. Looking back I'm not sure how I survived it. My life today seems almost boring.

I miss the days of little ones underfoot. I miss the sticky kisses and the skinned knees. Nowadays, my boys tower over me and I'm dealing with broken legs and collarbones. (Trust me, the skinned knees were easier!)

But they grew up, with or without my permission. So, Mary....Peter.....this song (or at least a part of it) is for you......

Is this the little girl I carried?
Is this the little boy at play?

I don't remember growing older

When did they?

When did she get to be a beauty?

When did he grow to be so tall?

Wasn't it yesterday

When they were small?

Sunrise, sunset Sunrise, sunset

Swiftly fly the years

One season following another

Laden with happiness and tears

Happy Birthday, birthday buddies! I love you bunches and bunches! Hope you have a great day!

Virtual Worlds...

I don't get the whole 'virtual world' of gaming that's going on today. Maybe it's because I'm getting older, though some of my 'old' friends seem to be getting into the game.

I had an invitaion on Facebook the other day to join in a game called "Yoville". It sounded a little like Dr. Suess to me, but I thought that if my friends are playing, maybe it would be fun. I was wrong!

So far, I have learned very little about how to play. I have created a character, and now I spend my time either in my virtual apartment, or I go to work.

I don't know how to interact with people on the game.

I haven't figured out how to decorate my apartment.

I can't even sit on my own couch!

My friends send me 'messages' that say nothing but 'cc'. After 15 or 20 of those, I messaged someone back and asked what it meant. "Coin Collecting" was the cryptic reply. Apparently, you get coins for messaging, but why not a real message? Why not, "Hi, how's it going?"

My virtual world has a gym.....I don't go to the gym in the real world, what makes you think I'm going to use a virtual gym?

My virtual world has a coffee shop.....I don't drink coffee. Why would I want a virtual latte?

My virtual world has a factory......all I do is punch a timeclock and I get credit for working......I know it doesn't work like that in the real world!

I know people who spend hours every day in their virtual worlds. They make virtual friends and have virtual fun. They build virtual lives in a computer world. It just makes no sense to me. I like to interact with real people and go real places. I do like games, just not virtual ones.

Monopoly anyone? I call dibs on the Top Hat!

What Next?!

What do these two things have in common?

They are both being given out at the drive thru at my bank.

If I drive through with a kid, they give the kid a sucker.

If I drive through with a dog, they give the dog a biscuit.

Mary is hoping that the next time she's with me at the drive thru they're handing out Patrick Dempsey!!

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom Not My Own....

The average pencil is seven inches long, with just a half-inch eraser -

in case you thought optimism was dead.

--Robert Brault

The Stash.....

I come by it honestly. "The Stash." I got it from my mother. My mother would buy gifts FAR in advance of when she would need them.

By the time the that Kristin and Jennie, the two oldest granddaughters, were 2 years old, my mother had dresses stashed for them that were sizes 6-8.

"But, mom..", I'd say, "they're only 2!! Why are you buying a size 6?"

"Oh", she'd reply, "these dresses are so adorable! And besides, they'll grow into them!"

She would also buy presents for other people's children. Just because. She would buy dresses, or hair ribbons or outfits or other surprises. Just for fun.

So I guess you could say that my gift of Stash was inherited.

When my kids were small, I'd shop the after Christmas sales and stock up on 'friend presents'. That way, when someone got invited to a birthday party and needed a gift we'd just go to my closet and pick something out. I had puzzles, games, toys....I always figured it was better to spend ahead and get 80-90% off than to wait for the last minute and overspend!

I also started the Christmas shopping for my kids months in advance. I once got an awesome remote control car for Jacob (I think he was about 8) that had an original price tag of over $60 for only $15. Granted, that meant that I had to hide it for 9-10 months, but it was well worth it. My only problem was: where to keep everything, and remembering that I'd bought it!

I still Stash today. I'm already done Christmas shopping for Mary. And I hit Kohl's 90% off racks today and picked up a couple of other Christmas gifts. I'm not sure who they're for yet, but it will all work out. And just think of the money I've saved!! Between Mary's Stash, and the things I bought today, I've saved close to $200!! (I'll have to make sure Joe reads this when he starts complaining about how much I spend on Christmas!)

I have to redeem myself here by saying that I don't just buy randomly, and I really don't go overboard. It's not like I have to have an outside storage unit to hide everything. And I don't have things stashed for Chrismas 2012!! Just one year at a time. I think it helps my budget to spread the cost out over an entire year instead of just the month of December. And because December in my house includes two birthdays I need all the help I can get!

So if anyone knows of any great deals out there, send them my way! After all, there are only 247 days until Christmas!

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom Not My Own......

A quote from the movie, Shenandoah--

If we don't try

we don't do.

And if we don't do,

why are we here on this Earth?

Behind the Mask.......

A friend of mine on Facebook wrote recently:

"I'm thankful for my role model's strength as she endures a burden I wish she did not have to go through. I'm glad that her faith is strong and that she knows all will be well. All my love dear friend."

In the comment section, I replied: "Thank you"

She was not amused and wrote back: "You can be my role model, but I really don't think you want to go through the burden."

In retrospect, it occurs to me that this response tell me a lot about myself as well as my friend.

About me, it says that I'm wearing well the mask that so many of us wear around our friends/acquaintances.....the mask that says "I'm doing fine, thank you!"

About my friend, it says that she really has no idea about the trials/burdens that I am facing in my life right now, and she is content to believe the mask.

This raises more than a few questions:

Why do we wear the mask, and why do we allow our friends to wear it??

Why is it that so many of us insist on carrying our burdens alone when there are so many around us that are willing/able to help??

Who among us would not be willing to help if our friends told us the truth: "you know, I'm really struggling with some things right now. I could use a friend to talk to."

I think that we wear the mask because we are too prideful to ask for help when we need it. We percieve asking as a sign of weakness instead of a sign of humility. Yet, if your friend came to you and shared her trials, wouldn't your first response be "How can I help you through this?" We want to serve one another, yet we don't want to be served.

We allow others to wear the mask because we don't want them to know that we see through the illusion. If they want to pretend and handle things themselves, then we don't want to interfere. We don't want to overstep our boundaries. So, even though we may know that everything is not okay, we let them pretend.

As far as carrying our burdens alone, how often do we hesitate to go to our Bishops or Home/Visiting Teachers thinking 'I don't want to burden them with this, they have enough to worry about' or 'I don't want to take them away from their family, I can handle this' Yet, aren't these the very people that God has charged with our care? Isn't that the beauty of the gospel, that we have people to turn to when we need help? And who among us hasn't heard the saying that God sometimes uses other people to answer our prayers. And that doesn't only mean calling the Elder's Quorum when someone is moving in/out of the ward!!

But, so often, we continue to carry the burdens alone, and wonder why nobody notices that we're struggling. Is it any wonder they don't notice, when all the while we continue to smile and say: "I'm great, how about you?"

So, in an effort to remove the mask, I'm going to lay it out there......."You know, I'm really struggling with some things in my life right now, and I could sure use your thoughts and prayers." There....I said it. I can't/won't go into details, as I'm not certain who reads this blog, but my prayers alone aren't cutting it. So, if you wouldn't mind putting me on your 'prayer list', I would be grateful. Maybe sometime in the (hopefully not too) distant future, we can talk more about this and I can let you know that everything turned out for the best.

Thanks. I feel better already!

Virtual Friends.....

So, my husband and two of my boys were at a church meeting tonight. Jacob (having had surgery on his collarbone yesterday) was sleeping, and Mary was playing video games. It was a nice peaceful evening, the computer was available, so I decided to catch up on some blog reading.

I was in the middle of this blog, when my husband and boys walked in from their meeting. My husband looks at the blog and says: "So, who's that?" To which I replied, "Um...... well..... I don't actually know her, but her name is Celia and she has 4 kids (I named them all) and this is her husband, Carl. But it's okay for me to read her blog because she's the friend of a friend so she's kind of my friend too!"

It sounded lame, even as I said it. Joe just shook his head and walked away. I shouted after him..."It's okay to have 'virtual friends', you know! It's not like I don't have any 'real life' friends!"

So, now I've decided that I need to come up with cover stories for all those blogs I read. For instance....Celia and I have been best friends since college (never mind that Celia was probably 8 year old when I was in college!) I could say something like "Oh, come on honey, don't tell me that you don't remember Celia! She was in our Business Law class!"

Other 'virtual friends' could be:
--'an old friend from high school'
--'she was in my ward growing up'
--'I met her when I served at Girl's Camp that one year'
--'oh, her? She in the other ward'
--'my mom's cousin's daughter'

You can see that I obviously need help here.....

.......your assignment??

Plausible cover stories. I'll be waiting.

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom Not My Own....

Winston Churchill wrote:

"To every person there comes that special moment

when he is tapped on the shoulder

to do a very special thing unique to him.

What a tragedy if that moment finds him unprepared

for the work that would be his finest hour."

Nothing like a relaxing walk.....

Dinner was done. Kitchen was clean. It was only 5:45 and the beautiful evening was calling me to come out and play. Here's how the next hour played out:

"I'm going for a little walk. Anyone want to come?"
(Guess which kid wanted to come. The one in a cast.)

"Peter, you're in a cast. I don't know that you can go on a walk."

"Okay, then I'll just ride a bike."
Great plan. Except that after struggling to get the bike out of the garage we discover that his bike has a broken seat.

"Maybe I could ride Eleanor's bike."
Manuvering carefully between the van, the other two bikes, and the garage wall, we finally get the other bike out. Two flat tires.

"Maybe they're not really flat. Maybe they just need to be pumped up."
By now, I'm losing my desire to take a walk, but I'm trying really hard to be patient. The kid has been cooped up in a splint or cast for a month now, he's stir crazy and just wants to get some exercise and fresh air.

So we pump up the tires. Once around the cul-de-sac tells us that, while it's not ideal, it might work. So, off we go. Me walking, him riding.

Half way down the street:
"This seat is really uncomfortable."
(I bite my tongue and keep walking.)

Down the street and around the corner.
"These pedals are spiky!"
"Well, maybe you should have worn a shoe on the other foot."
(one foot in a cast, the other with just a sock on)

Down to the next cul-de-sac.
"These gears are really messed up. I don't think I can ride this thing."

I tried to keep smiling as I asked what his plan was for getting himself and the bike back to the house.
"Maybe Mary could drive down and pick me up."

Which is how I ended up walking slowly home with a bike whose tires were steadily losing air and had crappy gears and spiky pedals.


Next time, I'm sneaking out the door and leaving the kids a note.