On Leaving the Nest......

Okay.....I know that my blog is titled "In Search of the Empty Nest"....but I'm not sure that I meant it. Some people (my children) have taken offense to the title, and are actually trying to leave!! So, I think a little clarification is in order.........

1. It is the natural order of things that children are born into a family. They grow up together in a loving home where they are nourished body and soul. They are educated in the ways of the world (like how to clean a bathroom and do their own laundry and maybe even cook a meal and do dishes!) Then at some point (hopefully before they are 30!!) they leave the comfort of the nest and go off to build their own nest and make their way in the world.

2. It is important to remember the family that you have left behind. They have, after all, invested YEARS of their lives into your well being and, as such, have a vested interest in you. You must 'touch base' on occasion. Phone calls work well for this purpose, as do letters, pictures, and personal visits.

3. Don't forget about your brothers and sisters. They also have a vested interest in you and your well being. You need to develop and maintain a close relationship with them. They can be your best friends in the years to come and will give you someone to reminisce with in later years. After all, who else can you talk to about the time that Eleanor broke her toe playing baseball barefoot in the backyard? Or the time that Laura cut her hand with the knife trying to show us that "it's not that sharp!" Or, who else will know what you're talking about when you say "Where's Goka?" Who else, but your brothers and sisters, can you talk to about anything that starts with "remember that time?" You NEED your brothers and sisters, and they NEED you!! (Remember Roo? The giant mud pit? The creek? Clarkdale? The freedom of the neighborhood? Big Red?)

4. Work hard!! I know that we made your life very comfortable and easy while you were here, but it's a big, bad world out there, and you'll need to work hard to make it. The days of "Mom, what's for dinner?" are gone. You want dinner, you make dinner. The same goes for "Mom. can you wash my blue shirt while I'm at school today?" You want your blue shirt washed? I hate to be the one to tell you, but there is no "laundry fairy"!! You're on you own. (I must interject here that my children have actually been doing their own laundry for years, but I thought I would add this for general purposes--you're welcome)

5. Don't forget to pray!! And know that those of us left here at home pray for you every day. We pray for your safety. And that you'll make good choices. And that you will know how much we love you and miss you. Prayer can and will be a shield and protection against the harshness of the world. Prayer will help you choose the right. Just think of it as the Ultimate GPS...How can you possibly go wrong if you listen to that little voice telling you what path to take? Remember that you have a Heavenly Father, too, and he also has a vested interest in you and loves you more than you will ever know.

6. You OWE ME!! Don't ever forget this one!! I'm (sort of) kidding, of course, but think about it...who else in this world would have carried you for 9 months and given birth to you? Who else would have spent all those years wiping your nose (and your behind!) Who else would pick you up when you fall, gently wash your scrapes and cuts, give you a kiss and a band-aid and send you back out there to conquer the backyard? Who else would stay up until all hours of the night making cookies or cupcakes for the class (think 'Day of the Dead' cookies!) Or stay up all night working with you to perfect your science project? ONLY YOUR MOTHER.

7. Be forgiving. When you get mad at me (and you will!) remember that I did my best. I wasn't right all the time, and you won't be either when you get to be a parent. But everything that I did, I did out of love for you. So when you think back on what some may call our 'disfunctional family', think back with love and forgiveness in your heart. Remember the times that I forgave your mistakes. The play-doh on the carpet, the broken dishes, the spilled milk. You were just learning, and guess what.....So was I. Learning how to be a parent just as you were learning how to be a kid. In that sense, we sort of grew up together.

So, go easy on me.

I know that someday you will all be grown and gone. They say that I will miss the chaos and the fingerprints on the walls and the towels on the floor. I don't know.....maybe I will. Maybe I will sit down and have a good cry the first time I clean a room and it stays clean for more than 15 minutes. Maybe I won't know what to do when the laundry is caught up and I no longer have to buy a 5 lb roast for Sunday dinner.

Yes, someday I'll have that empty nest. But for now.....I think I'll revel in the madness a little longer. Trying to write a blog with 'Super Smash Bros.' as background music. Stepping over the Hot Wheels cars and the blocks on the livingroom floor. Juggling school schedules and doctor appointments and scouts.

Thanks for making my life an adventure. I wouldn't trade it for anything!!

Some 'remember whens?' for my brothers and sisters:

--remember the time that Renn got Rice Krispies up his nose because Paul made him laugh so hard at the breakfast table?

--remember when Kati got busted for sneaking out of the house to go to Danceland after Dad told her "absolutely not"!

--remember Paul's broken arm/leg? And the time he stepped on a pitchfork?

--remember Grandma Irma riding the mini-bike at the lake house?

--remember when Mom fell into the pond in our backyard?

--remember the awesome sledding paths that Renn/Paul used to make?

--remember putting pennies on the train track?

So...Mike, Kati, Renn, Paul, Peter.....what are your 'remember whens'?